My Little World of Happiness

I have never been a person to write. I've started journals many times, but always quit by the third entry. In fact this is the first time I've had a blog. When I turned twenty I began writing my thoughts and feelings in a small journal. I counldn't stop. It was like a little addiction. Every few days I would add another entry. Until I came to Utah and there seemed to be way too much time and nothing to write about. But I see now there is always something on my mind, always something to say. always something to write. I cant seem to write enough. 
My status' on facebook seem to be updated constantly. I get a quote or lyrics or my own thoughts that have previously been written down. They all seem so perfect... until I find yet another that I love. 

My mother loved to write, read, and paint. It seemed to keep her thoughts off of her life. and in her dreams. I saw how much she loved it. It was a whole different world for her. One project after another. From painting cookie jars to writing childrens stories. The joy just seemed to radiate from her while she was at work on her projects. I miss seeing that happiness. And all the love that she put into it all. It seemed as though to come straight from the heavens above. It always brings back such memories when i see or read the things she created.  It brings me home. To my true home. With her.

I have always told myself that I will never walk in my mothers footsteps. I will look at her life and not make the same mistakes as she did. Learn from experience without actually experiencing it myself. I have already started this a few years back. Started out making my life...MY life. No one elses. No one to tell me how to live it, what profession to choose, or even who to love. It is still something i struggle with daily but I have full intentions to make this life fully MY choice.
On the other hand i do want to follow in my mothers footsteps. Even when her world was crashing down around her, she always knew how to keep herself happy in her on little world of happiness. I have that wanting to find "my little world of happiness"

Because of my poor writing habbits, bad grammar, and all of that.. I never had the desire to write anything. But for the past week or two something has come over me.
I have a full desire to write a novel. That has never been a want of me before. But i have all intentions of trying the challenge. Maybe this book needs to be written. Maybe its words that need to be heard or read by someone. I dont know the reasoning for my wanting to do this. It might be words needing to be said that were silenced forever. This is a way those words can get out. Maybe this is those words coming from heaven through me in My Little World of Happiness.